It's snowing in the winter wonderland of Englewood, New Jersey. I decided to get a mini break from the City life. In taking my time from the hectic daily of City life, I am currently reflecting on the importance of my life goals, and the people in my life who encourage my many passionate pursuits.
Recently I decided to no longer let the case of what if's, could have been and be, perhaps and lifes maybe's get the best of me. As easily as it has been written, the hardest reality of was the emotional ties being cut and no longer crossed.
It's like turning off an inner light in your heart.......I knew and know we could never be. I felt he discontent and the discord more than I felt comfort and happiness. Disillusioned and blinded to my reality of experiences......I set out to become someone I didn't know anymore. I pity myself then, but I championed myself as to what I am becoming now.
I am not content or happy with how I responded to you throughout all of our times spent together. I will omit to being selfish, to being only concerned with my own personal outcomes. When I assumed we could actually make an attempt at having a relationship, you were cold and distant and I realized that probably there would be no going back to assumed norms. The old adage of if it will be, it will be became our connecting piece, and also, distance weaver.........
I will never transition you into who I would love you to be and become, you will never transition me into that woman you foresee me being and becoming. Our gap will remain, and nothing last forever......they say.
I close off with I loved you. I have let you go.