Comfort Zone

A balance of energy will allow you to settle. The feeling of being a mixed bowl of uncontrollable emotions can get to you, but what allows you to be calm and absolutely in a relaxed and restive state is adhering to your inner self. When you realize that a rush for answers in demanding tones and in an uncharacterirstically way isn't what's needed, then you are left to once again tackle this situation. If I couldn't reslove your slight or hurt I would wonder If I couldn't discern between what was making you upset or bothered in a way I would wonder If I couldn't hear an answer as to why you are experiencing and going through some things then I would still wonder It's in the not knowing that gets me. When its noticable and reflective it becomes stifiling. At times you simply just want the person to blirt everything out, but then again you are being validated and acknowledge, what about their impending issue? A learning lesson towards myself is within allowing the depths of silence and wonderment to run hand in hand, and not worrying about whether I could or can make you happy once again, but my focus would be on detachment and non personlization. Yes it can be difficult to take yourself from out of the situation and simply wait a response, or gradually allow the individual in question to come around to you when ready. What I am learning once again is that not everything requires an answer. Not every slight is meant to deeply sink within the depths of your soul, so as to drown you within someone else's sorrow. It's an emotion, and it will soon pass, but being a solid figure and listening ear is always needed. Sigh

It's within the CHEMISTRY that we question it ALL.

Chemistry can be a connecting factor and a force to reckon with. Chemistry can also be a determining factor in regards to the next steps you wish to pursue with your selected lover. I have found that with my previous to present relationships chemistry has been a major factor resulting in several outcomes. Some of the outcomes resulted in shorter relationships, and other outcomes resulted in the string along effect. This effect occurs when there is no clear concise guidelines and sense of direction within your relationship. At times the string along affect went hand and hand with chemistry, because there was only that slight pull that kept the relationship current and existent. So I ask myself on this date, what it means to have chemistry and a deepened connection. What does it mean to be vulnerable and imperfectly perfect with your significant other? I can’t rely on my past and previous experiences to afford me the answers I have been long awaiting, but what I can do is look to my present and allow my thoughts and reactions to an action become filtered into my chemistry stream of love and more, and demand a deepened experience from myself and significant other. I am looking at chemistry entirely different now, as I am looking at my relationships and the quality over quantity experience. At times I want to simply have at it, and just not think about anything further then what's to be “expected”, but then the connecting force of that good ole chemistry allows me to experience a revolving of so many emotions and feelings, that I am unable to simply see things in a one sided kind of way. So at this very moment I am putting together the pieces of desire, lust and new found interest to passion, like/love and a mutual ecstasy that allows my mind to venture further for more.

Innocence is bliss…

I decided to look at you, and when I looked at you I really looked at you. I looked within in you, and as you spoke to me everything seemed to become clearer. The fear is a self-imposed slum created by myself. Within this fear I am left to venture on my own. I can’t tell you how many times I have allowed this fear to simply swallow an experience. An experience that needed time to grow and space to pace itself out, but no…I simply didn’t want to allow anything to seep within to nurture, develop and grow; I rushed light speed into lust without ever knowing love, and as I look back on the time spent rekindling nothingness I am left in a stilled silence. That was then… Currently, the fear and doubt exist still, but I don’t allow them to outweigh my passion for more. My love for the shared continuation of two lives drawn in unison to fall lovingly together through in-depth experiences carries my soul.