How will I ever right the wrongs

My thoughts are at war with the obvious…it’s just not happening how I had hoped for, expected and planned. Disappointment has set in and the idea that this was all a cruel dream has pulled all my heartstrings.

I have been on my most improper and nonchalant behavior, but do you think this would even put a damper in the feelings of utter rejection that have been created by my simplest thoughts of you.

Another fantasy short lived. Another imagination full of unlimited hugs and kisses. The thought of “there is more” the belief that it was mutual and experienced at the highest level no longer exists. I pardon my hurt, my inner doubts and my desire to erase everything I have known and know of, because yet I still remain hopeful that you and I will exist.

The utter reminder of my past experiences and how presently perfect you remind me of my former loves…everything cant be happening as so and if so what am I to learn from this heart ridden sorrows?

I guess not everything needs to be explained.

Yet another experience that I could not identify where it started or where it began to sink and went absolutely wrong, or if it did go wrong? I have so many unanswered and doubt ridden questions.

Why is love a deceiver to me? Why do I feel as if love will never love me back?


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