Within passion resides a lost you…..

As much as we throw ourselves into others, be it their lives, or their homes or even their bodies; we are constantly at the expenses of someone else. If you have a long day at work, or your home life is too tough or situated to where you aren’t content, who do you call and turn to? Who embraces you for that moment in time when escapism is the key? Who guides you back to normalcy, or provides the mystical moments in disguise of it all. Secretly embracing you and enveloping your stress and at times pain. As I lay my head backwards and look up at your ceiling I only answer with a silent thank you. Thank you for taking your time out to console me. Thank you for taking the time out to let me know that everything and each passing moment spent with you without you will continue to be OK. Getting lost in your passion and kisses and body excites me to the point of forgetting everyone and it all. Do I continue to drink from your waist, neck, inside your thighs, you lips and tongue…….or do I pull away and look towards the door, but glance back at you? I begin adjusting my body on your bed. As I sit up and look forward at the walls I feel the cold night’s air creeping up towards me. You make the slightest attempts to reason with me, or bring the covers back over me, because you are accepting of our arrangement. You know that once I get up and walk towards your door, there is no turning back. The passion bubble and love experienced throughout the day and creeping into the night will no longer exist. So as I slide off your bed and move towards the door I recap the day and semi night spent with you. The laughter shared and the conjoined moments, the instant mood booster, and also, problems resolved or dissolved………..

I sit up and walk towards the door. Not willing to compromise or transition what we have into something that can develop further. I only am thinking of and about myself at the moment. My selfish needs and wants surpass even yours. I know I am not right thinking or feeling this way; however, I am not wrong for putting you off. I am not wrong from saving you from a life style or situational occurrence style relationship. Wouldn’t you prefer all of me then half or some of me? How deep is my love one would ask? I’m not taking the dive to risk knowing it.

Never too far…….
One day you will see that my love was ever lasting and stronger than any love you ever experienced. My time and patience with you was more then you expected, but it was something unexpected. You didn’t think I would interest and intrigued by you, or stay actively attracted to you. We fit so perfect together and related so well together, but yet you pushed me aside and distanced us more and more. As I look to others to shelter me from the cold night and empty heart beats, I can’t help but think of you. Our moments experienced and expressed and felt. Our night lying next to each other, me on my side listening to your breathing and snores. Slowly then turning inside your side to embrace and kiss you, and then snuggle even closer to you. My love for you will never falter, but it has limits.

Lesson Forty Nine: Just so much you can soak up….

You can see relationships from many lights. You can even few the differences and changes in a way that is satisfactory before one’s eyes, or depressingly pushing to another. I gave two viewpoints as to why I continue to linger and love you. I embrace change and transition and entertain temporary people, however, they will never amount to an entire you.


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