Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Life in droplets……..

Ever notice the rain running downside your window pane? Ever notice how often the pitter and pat resides in your mind? The moment the rain droplet slide down, another one forms and so goes a continued pattern. This pattern reminded me of my current state. In constant motion; starting off large and leveling out to splash of life and love. Although nothing in life is routine, everything is meant to be experienced and presented to you in your timely matter of living. Everything we give and receive has the rain run schedule. I call it the rain run schedule, because it’s constant moving and never stagnant at any given moment. At times the rain run may go down slowly, and in the times the pattern is slowed down I believe this brings attention to perhaps the experiences we may need to experience slowly and thoroughly. As painful as times can be, and at moments we may even want to recede into ourselves our burst that rain drop to get on with the splash or life in general, however, we must remember that in times of pain, gloom and doom there is always an amending way. There is always hope for a better progressed day and moment. There is always the hope that the end of the tunnel, that silver lining or that break in time will present and transform a better and best you. Like a rain drop on the upside commencing on to the downside, things continue to get better. The old saying and adage was “it gets better uphill” well gliding down the window pane and exploring life in general is as amazing as it can get and be. Downhill never looked so well!

Call it as I see it….
Elemental pulls beckoned you to me. Normally I wouldn’t be as interested in attempting or pursuing anything on an intimate level with you, however, on this night everything must have aligned because baby it was just you and me. The crashing waves and the glittering stars served as candle lights to my already lit and dimmed mind. Dreamy and steamy are the two connective words I would utilize for this moment. As I embrace your body to mine I thought to myself “Memories are forever more and take me away, I will always think and recall this moment in time. I captured my essence”.

Although I have been seriously entranced in a enjoying me moment and attitude, and making life as pleasing and happy and me friendly as possible, I continue to think and wonder about you. I missed you and actually took time to think of and about you, and recall situational instances and occurances. I question and ask myself daily, why is it so hard to let you completely go? Why am I holding on to a memory of sorts? Am I a glutton for heart ache and agony? I could have been crushed by my attempts of making me moments, however, I was not. A failed attempt at a one night stand, which result in a deletion of the person on all social networks and forms of communication, to am erased moment and thought in regards to that experience. I started feeling down in the dumps, wishing that it was you I kissed, and open my heart and soul up to. The way you caress and touch my body from head to toe. Your lips are in tuned with my sweet spot. It’s as if you drink from the fountain of youth. You never tire or get old. I love that about you. In fact I am in love with. I fell head first and was in admission of this moment, but you let me down. Actually I let myself down. I waited so long to express my feelings and intentions for you. If I would have called things out from the start, would you have stayed? If I would have been upfront and honest about my needs and wants, would you have wanted them? Would I have experienced them and you? The choices we make in life…….. Well I choose to continue to be tortured by my love for you. I am not ready to loosen those ties just yet. There is an actual reason for me being engaged in your life and vice versa. The reasoning I have not as of yet resolved, however, we are us or I alone leaving you is meant to be. Crazy and super cool all at once.

Lesson Fifty: From the beginning to end……….
Comparing life and experiences to a rain drop, and then zipping into an instant moment of unkempt and unclaimed passion, to lastly returning back to zen like state. I am thinking of and about him constantly, however, life continues to catch me by the coat tails. I love the moments and people in them. Every experience is meant to be felt and shared. One moment brings forth a life time of memories. So let it rain drop, splash into unkempt and claimed passions, to then lastly focusing on my heart. Ah I value these moments. These are the days…..

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