No Expectations......Try it!

Defining something in the midst of it whatever it may be or will become has been a life struggle personally for myself in regards to my relationships. Today I finally acknowledged that making self definitions in the start of something caused expectations and cemented ideals and standards that could never be attained or lived up to, because I never gave it (my expanding mind and heart) a chance. Learning this has allowed me to begin to uncover more of my disinterest and immediate dislikes with potential and previous partners. Singling out someone because of your expectations and ideals can actually cross them entirely off your romantic list. Assuming that you will feel the fire works and hear the slightest wedding bells in the midst of meeting “the one” has shadowed each and everyone’s minds to the max and is causing disinterest in the dating and relating realm. A simple date can conjure up more then what if’s for the moment, try the five year plan what if’s. A night on the town with the attention and interest of getting to know your date was once the pressurized themed night, to now almost turning a dating experience into a life interview for the long term. Talk about pressure! In today’s world we have enough going on and happenings to incur additional stress, especially in the areas of our lives that are supposedly pleasure seeking and adventure oriented. So why not enjoy the moment in time with a prospective partner with no expectation of what if’s or that damned five-year plan. How about going about life on a daily basis. Finding the ability to successfully survive another 24 hours. and within that 24 hours your find pleasure, enjoyment and solace with each and everyone you have shared your day with. How this relates to the dating experience one would ask? Well you simply have to internally look at your dating experience and really analyze where exactly have your dating experience gone astray. You also have to define are you the lonely lover craving what you feel you need in another, or are you the one looking for someone to compliment and solidify your life and experiences thus far? With those two types listed you automatically begin to feel a world of pressure. How about becoming an undefined type. Someone who is interested in self enhancement and personal achievement and betterment individually in their own life, as well as meeting like minded individuals to pursue an undefined initial relationship based on friendship and mutual interest. The value and beauty of this relationship is the start that it was given without any expectations or demands from on each other. So in essence taking your time to arrive to your destination is actually more valued than predicting, projecting and speeding ahead. I wouldn’t mind being a life tortoise, because now I know my destination!